This week the Verge, being on verge, is interviewing a character from a book rather than the author. Why? Because the author is nice, but less interesting than the character (aren’t they always?). Sorry, Gene. Oh, by the way, the character is Adam – and he’s immortal. He travels a lot and has more intimate knowledge of history, having lived it, than any of us will ever know from reading recorded history.
WotV: Hi, Adam. How are you today?
Adam: I just discovered a television channel with pornography on it. I wish I could say I‘m excited by this, but nobody looks like they’re actually enjoying themselves. Still, it’s a find. I had no idea the channels went this high.
WotV: Did you happen to bring Iza with you? Iza is a fairy and I happen to be quite fond of her.
Adam: Iza is in the other room right now, which is fine as she’s been in a mood since Clara left. She keeps making this huffing noise and muttering something that sounds like “men!” It’s like living with a stereotype; I think I should stop letting her watch the soaps.
Oh, but I have to correct you. Iza is not a fairy; she’s a pixie. Fairies are larger and more terrifying.
WotV: It’s awfully nice of you to tell Gene Doucette your stories. Does he have something on you?
Adam: I was considering making up a grand story about him saving my life or my saving his, or hinting at some sort of dark secret or racy photograph, but the truth is we just hit it off and it was time for me to talk. I mean, there are parts of my life that turn up in one historical record or other, but none of those are from my perspective. Gene does a decent job of taking my rambling stories and turning them into something that makes sense.
Just don’t tell him I said something nice about him.
WotV: What’s your favorite beer?
Adam: Egyptian beer, circa… let’s see, 4,000 BC? It was dark, very alcoholic, and had a certain rawness you just don’t get from anything brewed now.
But since I can’t get that, I tend to settle for whatever’s available.
WotV: Of all of the creatures you’ve encountered, what/who is your favorite? Least favorite? Why?
Adam: Favorite is very easy, and you would think so too if you ever met a succubus. But in fairness, it really depends on what I’m doing at the time. Succubus… well, that’s obvious. But if I need a drinking buddy it’s hard to go wrong with an iffrit. Vampires make excellent long-term travel companions, satyrs are excellent to hunt with, and if you need something stolen having an elf or a goblin with you will definitely improve your chances.
Least favorite… there are many, many things out there that should be actively avoided. Demons are probably at the top of the list because they are very nasty and fairly common. But there are rarer things out there much more dangerous than demons. Like nymphs.
WotV: How many hearts do you estimate you’ve broken over your lifetime?
Adam: Impossible to say. But I don’t think I’m terribly easy to fall in love with, so I can’t imagine the number is huge. And sexually I tend to be a short-term solution rather than a long-term investment, so most of the time my chosen amour knows the deal heading into things. Plus I don’t tend to stick around long enough for this sort of thing to get too involved.
Have I added enough qualifiers to get out of this question intact?
WotV: Hmmm. I suppose I’ll move on… In Immortal, you present a lot of history. Do you think Gene knew any of that stuff before you taught it to him or would he have had to do research to get it right?
Adam: Gene researches to see if I’m making things up entirely, which is not a completely unreasonable concern. He will also research to get the time right, or as close to right as we can manage under the circumstances. Since I didn’t have a watch or a modern calendar with me most of my life the question of “when” or “how long ago” is surprisingly complicated. For instance, we guesstimated how old I am by discussing the climate of equatorial Africa from when I was a child.
WotV: It seems that Gene has plans to tell more of your story. Do you want to drop any hints about it? Please?
Adam: My understanding is Gene will be releasing a chapter of Hellenic Immortal when this tour is over. But: the book covers some of the time I spent in the early Greek peninsula, a surprisingly resilient cult, and a god.
WotV: Do you think the woman with red hair is your destiny? Do you believe in destiny?
Adam: No, I don’t believe in destiny. I used to joke that the only people who blamed bad things on fate were the ones who weren’t creative enough to think of a god to blame. Sophocles hated that it when I said that.
Pursuing her is something to do, and since I’m nearly positive she’s older than I am, it’s a worthwhile pursuit. But I don’t think she’s my destiny any more than I believe in true love. I will resume searching for her again soon enough, and I expect to eventually catch up with her, but only because the world is too small for it not to happen.
WotV: It seems like your favorite things to do are get drunk and have sex. Is that accurate? Any other favorite pastimes?
Adam: Um, well I’ve had other interests certainly, but those interests run in time with societies. For example, I enjoyed gambling on Colosseum gladiators, but only as long as there was such a sport. And I liked farming when I had the time and the land. And reading. I’m a big fan of reading.
And… well, all right I guess sex and drinking really are at the top of the list. But only because they’ve been around for the longest.
Thank you so much for visiting the verge, Adam. I’m looking forward to reading more of your story, but right now, I think I hear Iza breaking something. General Hospital must be on…